Sunday, March 11, 2007

Cirling without courage

They're circling, round and around (I watch him talk to the my friends totally unaware) Words that do nothing to secure the sinking in my stomache, and i know i'm going to be sick. I christened the toilet and allowed him to leave thinking it was about him, he called later worried, 'it's not always about you.' I don't know if that's a lie or not.

I woke up with the sense that i had lost something, S and I sat hungover in silence on the DLR trying to not think about the heartache feeling the film had left us. I thought about the circling words again, and it was courage that i had lost, no not lost, lacked. I lacked the courage to be honest, not only to him, them all, but to myself.

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